When you’re asked out by someone who wants to go for a pint, which of these considerations should give you the greatest pause?

  • He’s five years older.
  • He has two small children.
  • He’s an undertaker.
  • He’s good buddies with one of your cousins.
  • He lives in Elmira.
  • He’s utterly Scottish. (Not semi-Scottish like the Sherry or the Andrew…)
  • His peeps are from Bruce County (which is next door to Grey County).
  • He plays the bagpipes.
  • He claims to be a scotch fan, but when asked about his favourites, utters words like “Glenlivet” and “Chivas”. (Ahem, I’m not even a scotch drinker and I drink better scotch than that.)
  • He uses “lol” in chat.

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