My friends are cool. Without fail they will zoom to the rescue should I start beating myself about the soul with the Big Stick of Existential Angst. Interestingly, Sherry took on one side of the issue at hand, and Dana took on the other. Without going into the whole of it (get your own damned smart friends), some key learnings:
- deus ex machina is never really a character in the play
- Melle who does nothing but take care of other people starts to cease to exist
- sometimes we’re lucky enough to find people who are smart enough not to listen to us, and we end up better for it
- there is value in writing yourself down
- there are ways in
- there will be no big fuckin’ black cat staring at my exposed ass at any time in the future… hehe!
And from Dana:
- it’s kinda not surprising that I scare/intimidate people, cuz there are a lot of parts of me that are not/do not appear to be what people expect (of me or of a woman in general)
- because of how my mind works and how I understand things I could be really, really evil, but I’m not, which is a good thing for all concerned
- I’m not girly
- I’m not someone who you’d get the impression is emotional, which would tend to prevent other people from showing emotion around me
- it’s not easy for people to get to know me
- I spend a lot of time in my head, and have things figured out by the time I talk about them (Mom says that’s how I started talking, too – nothing, and then I went all Stewie Griffin with the sentences and whatnot).
For the record, if I like you, I’ll talk to you. Probably make fun of you (rather mercilessly). If I don’t like you, I will avoid you, and will say mean things about you to other people. 🙂
Anyway, I went to the gym last night, then ran around suburbia with a wild dog, then ate pizza, all of which, along with the analysis and a chat with a remarkably sane, mellow, and patient male personage, fixed me right up. Then I slept for, like, 11 hours. Long day.